April is Cesarean Awareness Month and I myself am a c-section mommy!
C-sections are hard themselves but imagine having your first baby at 16 and being told that “your baby is in danger because your birth canal is too small for him, so we need to perform an emergency c-section right away”
They started prepping me for it and quickly wheeled me away to a huge room full of lights and machines. I was there alone because since this was not planned there was no time for people to get ready and join me. I was laying in that bed surrounded by complete strangers. I believe I started to hyperventilating and thats when one of the nurses next to me looked at me and held my hand. He told me everything would be okay and that I would be a great mother. He held my hand the whole time because when I woke up after falling asleep at some point his hand was still wrapped around my limp hand. He then said “look your baby is almost out” then the doctor followed soon after and said “okay darling you’re going to feel a lot of pressure but he is almost out”
Soon after I heard the nurses “aawwee” and “look he’s so plump” which was so funny to me. Then I heard him cry and that made me cry because it then became real I was a mom. They brought him to me and I started talking to him and he stoped crying. Thats when the nurse that had been holding may hand said “you see he knows your voice.”
The rest is history! but its a big part of who I am.
Although I did not have the beautiful dilevery I envisioned with a room full of the people who loved me it was beautiful just the way it happened.
To the mom or the mom to be who have or will be going through this..I want you to know that you’re a strong individual and to try to enjoy the process as weird as that may sound. It’s not a pretty process and it’s not necessarily the one you might want but it’s the way that you will bring your baby into this world. And that’s something you will cherish your whole life.
Don’t let people tell you “you took the easy way out” or “you don’t know the pain” because first of it’s not the easy way out, if anything it’s the hardest way to go about it. I know because I’ve had a VBAC and now that was easy (for me anyways) sometimes moms don’t have a choice, things could’ve gone extremely wrong if I wouldn’t of had mine done. The pain is the worst maybe not during the csection because we are under anesthesia but the healing process is very hard.
All births are beautiful whether it was vaginal or a c-section. We have all endure the pain and the process of bringing life into this world. One is not better than the other. However your brought your child into this world be proud.
Be proud of the scar and the stretch marks they tell your story. They are beauty marks now. Be proud of them, you and your body.